Friday, 4 July 2014

Okay, I admit that I can't help reading my reviews and yes I get a kick out of people saying nice things about by stories but it will never cease to amaze me how bizarre some reviews can be. As I've mentioned before, my one and only review on amazon uk was from some one who was disappointed I'm not  Jeanette winterson (I know go figure!) my second review on uk is also just as special. Book one was apparently okay but his main gripe seems to be the fact he's having trouble downloading and the poor chap seems rather confused as to whether he's actually read the book or not. The advice is always not to engage when people don't give good reviews but these two aren't bad reviews as such they just don't really make any sense, ah well ce la vie! I've had some really lovely ones on goodreads and blogs so can't complain. 

Sit still and stop moaning !

I'm in a bit of a quandary however about whether to offer some of these lovely people more books in the series for free. Not, you understand because I have any doubts about giving freebies, I'm always more than happy to share my work with anyone who's willing to read and if they enjoy it all the better my worry is I don't want to appear like a nuisance. I don't want people to think I'm forcing it on them, in fact if anything I like giving a gifts (as my credit card company will tell you) and now I'm on smashwords again and can give out freebie coupons I've even been throwing a few around on whisper. For some reason I can't seem to gift on amazon, my guess is they're worried about me spreading my filth and corrupting people! So, do I contact kind reviewers and offer them the next book or does that just come across as needy?

Does I seem needy?

 I think a lot of it boils down to the fact that I'm still not actually comfortable thinking of myself as a writer, even the language makes me cringe a little, it feels like I'm showing off but maybe that's just me being a bit too English at times. As a nation we're all for people being a success just as long as they don't tell anyone about it! For example the phrase "my work" sounds horribly pretentious and the brethren stories are far too short to be called books, so where does that leave me? I read some figures once that mean technically I'm in the top 10% of Indy authors purely because I actually sell some books (and having published a 'proper' book I can say selling doesn't just happen unless you find a niche) but I guess a combination of the fact that I write such hard core filth and my own reticence means I'm never really going to be in a position to boast. Ah well yet again ce la vie.

Sometimes you've just got to lay back and accept what's happening!

I've rather gotten into whisper the last few days, you can be honest with people behaving like cocks without having to be too involved, I had to step away from reddit because it gets too heavy and Facebook has to be my everyday clean persona.  I do get a little tired of being sent cock pictures and asked for naked shots in return but it's a laugh handing out sec advice to kinky newbies and younger pervs. I'm tired today so my typing accuracy is right out the window it also means I spend as much time deleting as typing, the fact that my iPod won't behave while it's charging doesn't help, it takes on a life of it's own but it's okay, I'm powering  though today. It's my last shift before a long weekend and I can't wait. This of course also means I don't have my work head on and although I've got a fucking great to do list I'm damned if I'm going to actually do any of it. 

I'd love to do some paperwork but I'm just a bit busy at the moment! ( see I resisted using the "tied up at the moment" pun, that's cuz I'm a writer !)

Sometimes we have to be practical even when we don't want to be!

As predicted book 19 is written, even though I didn't get quite as much peace as I'd hoped, ended up sharing an office with some one who whined constantly, (thanks a bunch Ian and btw you have no right to moan you've been handed a job on a plate so shut the fuck up it's not tough and it's keeping a roof over your kids heads! But I digress) The boss and I have now got a long weekend off together so in between doing all the holiday stuff like going to the coast and treating ourselves to meals out, I should be able to get a first edit done and maybe even publish by Tuesday but if there's one thing I've learned from all this is not to count my chickens. 

My guess is that the boss wants to get some pretty hard core game play in over the weekend as well. A very necessary trip to the chiropractor left me feeling like I'd been hit by a truck last night and this led to several less than subtle comments about my being in trouble for not putting out and giving him ball ache! 

I am also aware of the purchase of a leather bondage bra

Not the actual bra but damn close!

and seeing as he's not the one with the tits in this relationship my guess is I'm going to be the one wearing it, looks fucking excellent so and can't wait to try it. The boss tends to leave his pc on so I got a glimpse of his at page, boy am I going to look fucking stupid if he gives it to some one else, although I'm probably tempting fate saying it i think when it comes to monogamy I'm pretty safe, the boss is very loyal and if I'm honest far too fucking lazy to play around! the bra will however will go very nicely with my new crossed cuffs!

I've just had a thought, is it still called a bra if it's purpose isn't to support but restrain? Should I actually be calling it a harness? I let you know after I've tried it on. Now there's a sweet thought, combining the harness with clamps!!! Oh yes, like the idea of that a lot!!! A  bonus in my wage packet meant a bit of splurging on new vibes, of course the cheap ones come from china which means waiting a while for them to be delivered but it's worth it. Over the years various remote control ones haven't been turned off properly and despite changes of batteries have died. I've ordered a voice activate one and a couple of wireless ones and a handful of little cheap ones. 

The boss has a game he likes to call "shut up and live with it" which involves me wearing a one battery wonder in my pussy or butt until it dies.

 Tied hands mean I can't remove it and as I found out the hard way, just letting it slip out means a hard core spanking, the boss has a nasty habit of not explaining the rules of a game until I break them but I must put the rest of my bonus aside for getting my sleeve finished, ink doesn't come cheap but it's something I've meant to do for a long time. I love the endorphin rush a long session in the chair brings on. The last piece I had done took roughly 6 hours and I was high as a kite by the end of it, I even kind of like the sore itchy healing part, I was always the kid who liked to pick scabs. I like pain if I'm in control of it, I've always done my own piercings for that very reason, I can damage myself till the cows come home but the thought of some one else doing it is a no no. I love the fact tattooist's chairs are just like thoughs in Dr's and dentist's.

Oooo, now that's a sweet thought, being tied to the chair while I'm tattooed!!

Book 19 kind of wandered off on a tangent and this means I need to make a decision about 20. The plan was for James to go straight to the institute where the parish council retrain subs to be a good spouse but James got way laid which means he won't get to the institute till book 20 BUT I have some ideas to do with carnivals, freaks shows and fairs. Can I be disciplined enough to take James to where he's supposed to go of do I just play it by ear?? I need to do some proper planning, this has happened before just as I think I know where I'm going something distracts me and I head off into the woods chasing butterflies!
I've become slightly fascinated by some Japanese porn just lately, I found some wonderful footage of women being use in glory holes 

and I'm def going to play with the concept, cute little disembodied ass's sticking out ready to be used, can't get much more objectified than a woman who's only parts that are exposed are the bits you can fuck! Just a set of holes held together by anonymous flesh and a pair of tits for decoration! Being able to use my iPod to write at work is a mixed blessing, yes I get a lot done but now I'm horny as hell sitting at my desk, without wishing to be crude I get through a lot of panty liners, not that I think crude is really and issue I mean if you're reading this because you've read my books you're not going to be expecting recipes are you.

Urggh! This shift is going on for ever!!! I just want to get home and get playing, I'm manning our other office today and it's deadly quiet, good for writing but annoying in that I have to stop by my usual office to pick up some parcels. I'm hoping it's the pin wheel I ordered, I was just going to use it for the cover of 19 but just as much as I snoop about on the boss's pc he creeps about on my laptop so I've been ordered to hand it over. We lost out previous one which was no bad thing because the boss does like to leave marks with the damn things. He has a keen sense of exactly where nerve endings are and understands has a tendency to look for spots where there's not much padding between skin and bone.

Oh for fucks sake!! I'm just winding myself up now, the days going to go even slower if I sit here think of all the things I want the boss to do to me

This would be a start and maybe some of this......

Oh my god today is going sooooo slowly!!

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