Friday, 15 November 2013

Oh happy day my bench has arrived, the Boss says I can open it and set it up when he's home Saturday. I've got a day off today and woke to find a note sitting on my laptop giving instructions to be wearing a butt plug and ben wa when he gets home (failure to comply will mean having to wait till Sunday for my bench). The Boss knows that I've got loads to do today so there will be no sitting still hoping to avoid any stimulation!! The Boss is very good at causing maximum torment for me without having to do too much himself.

Work was quiet this week so got loads of writing done, it love sitting in such a public place writing. Tapping away on my ipod getting hornier and hornier describing lots of heinous, depraved acts of sexual torture, while my colleagues are oblivious.They know I've published, just not what!

The downside is of course spending my evenings all wound up wanting the Boss to tie me up use me like a whore when he's playing at being Mr "I'm in control of your body!".

The criminal ward of the doll hospital is turning out to be a nasty, nasty place. I'm really getting into my stride! Missing limbs, occlusion and now a big fat dose of breath play......


The word 'play' makes it sound like fun,


some how, I doubt my next victim would call what's about to happen to her 'fun'!



Saturday, 9 November 2013

Book 15 has taken forever to get into it's stride but suddenly I've got so many ideas I'm having to plan ahead to 16, which is cool. I'm on a bit of a medical kick, I like the idea of an archaic looking hospital ward, with an air of Victorian torture and pain about it but I also dig the kind of sterile Nurse Ratchet kind of thing. 

The joy of course is I can have both!!!

Old school nightingales, nursing braced and broken steam punk monsters


creating dependence and helplessness!  


and elsewhere in the doll hosptial sterile white bullies degrade everyone they touch!!!


And of course what hospital doesn't have a laboratory................. 


One of life's little pleasures is getting parcels in the mail and because The Boss is insisting I behave myself and wait to play until my new spanking bench arrives, I have been treating myself to new toys. Just small things but I have got to have an outlet for my frustration.

The Boss learnt a long time ago that keeping a sub obedient and ready to serve is just as much about denial as using them. He knows by the time my bench finally arrives I'll be so desperate to be used and hurt,  that I'll be up for letting him force his cock into any hole he chooses!!!


Because I work, it's easier to get stuff delivered to the office, I have to be uber careful making sure I get the right address at checkout, something like the bench arriving just could not be explained away. Having a big black metal chair with very suspicious loops arrive while we had some one here fitting a kitchen was embarrassing enough. He didn't believe my 'I'm looking after it for a friend' for a second! Although, now I think about it, having a guy try to read the electric meter with a straight jacket hanging just above his head (I'd hung it up to air in the cupboard and forgotten) was slightly worse.

I have to admit I get a bit of a giggle when packages arrive and colleagues ask, what I've got. 

I passed this off as......


"New scart leads for my Tv!"

Well, it is going to be inserted into something for entertainment.

These were passed off as, parts for a fish tank pump! 


The trick is not to claim the parcel contains anything interesting, so no one asks to have a look, it's a small office and there really isn't much to do! The Boss has been mean about my goodies though, he's confiscated the nipple killers and informed me that he gets to choose when they're used and how! I have orders to wear the plug to work at least twice this week (I'm allowed to choose which days) but I have a feeling my first taste of the killers will not involve me making any choices. 

It will be when the Boss decides it's time, it will be for as long as he chooses and will hurt (I hope). 

Sunday, 3 November 2013

I have got to be sooo careful!! The great ebook clean up is wiping out self published porn left right and centre. Most of the books mine get paired with have disappeared, it's scary. I've always been careful to avoid the big taboos, realistic age play, families, animals etc. but every time I open my inbox or check my bookshelf I'm terrified they're going to block me too! How hard could it be for a retailer like the mighty zon to set up some way of having an adult only section?


Book 15 is going soooo slowly, ironicly I'm too distracted and horny to write porn. How dumb does that sound. I keep wandering off and window shopping for toys on ebay. I have a wish list as long as my arm!! My new kneeling bench should be delivered this week and the Boss is being a swine making me wait till it gets here to play. Other than having a massive tantrum and demanding to be hurt or at the very least spanked till I'm bruised I'm just going to have to wait, arrgh!!

I love the aftermath of a full on game, the sore bits at the corner of my mouth where the gag bit in, the metallic tang of blood on my tongue when I can't resist touching and worrying at them to make them sting. Those shared looks and smiles when your out in public and he knows the secret of what's buried deep inside me, Ben wa can be a subs best friend. Ordering me to wear a butt plug to work, then texting me during the day to tell him how it feels, oh sweet Boss I want you to spank me so so hard!!

Nothing worse than a sub bitch in heat 'sigh', concentrate woman!!

Ok, so I've got the story bit of the book out of they way it's time to get James to the doll hospital with Dr Steinmetz, not sure if I've already posted these pics but I like them.

I want the doll hospital to have that real Benson/Gord vibe about it!


Hands tied so you can't fight, having the jack forced open a little further every day!!

Tits, swinging as every movement is accompanied by the rustle of rubber!!!

I'm a mess.....